Merry Christmas wishes…

Hope everyone has a merry and wonderful Christmas day! It feels like the hustle and bustle of the holidays slows down after Christmas eve and the actual Christmas day.

Wishing everyone takes the time to sleep in, drink hot cocoa, love each other, and savor the last bit of Christmas lights and fun.

Also, thank you for sending me your encouraging thoughts and comments after last night’s post. Having this cold for days has put me in a funk with less patience, thinking negatively, and getting irritated too quickly. I did have that mini discussion with Elliot today: I reminded him that I don’t willfully try to make his life miserable by telling him to do things. As we were talking, I realized my word choice of “telling” and that made me realize that I need to do less telling. We need to work as a team and that I will be more mindful to have more patience and be less frustrated.

It’s hard to have these talks, but once we do it creates space for peace at home. Whew, glad we had that talk.

And of course this holiday season:

Happy birthday to Jesus!!

Once in our world, a stable had something in it that was bigger than our whole world. – C.S. Lewis

2018 outdoor Bethlehem drama at Santa Clara Baptist Church

2018 Bethlehem drama at Santa Clara First Baptist Chruch

So hard to be a mom

This is just some random thoughts about motherhood as I’m laying in bed unable to fall asleep.

It’s tough to be a fun, likeable, and patient mom a lot of times. To be like that most of the time is almost impossible.

I have unreasonable expectations of myself that I need to be this way and that as a mom. How do others make it seem so effortless?! Is it so?!

I’m feeling particularly vulnerable tonight with a cough that hurts my chest and feeling exhausted from arguing/ disagreeing with my 8-year-old son about daily life issies: fighting with his sister, who does what first, why does mommy do this or that, it’s not fair, I wish you’d, etc. All my insecurities surface and I blame myself for the these conflicts.

I know tomorrow will be a better day as I recover from this cold and begin fresh. A solution to this may be shifting my mindset that it’s inevitable that I’ll let my kids down. This is just a part of life, being human, and growing from mistakes. Whew…it’s hard stuff: growing pains for both kids and parents.

I try to remember that they are only young once and I try to enjoy this time. But when you’re in the thick of it with kids testing your limits and finding theirown personalities, you just want to be left alone to eat a whole bag of chocolate/ chips/ tub of ice cream in the comfort of a dark closet in the most stretchy pants ever.

Thanks for reading this far! I tried to write a bright and happy post because Christmas is a day away, and I didn’t want to be a party pooper. But I couldn’t. My heart is not there.

I’ll get in the spirit soon as I recover and have a long reconciling talk with my son tomorrow. Now I need to get some rest. Feeling better after I’ve shared. Thanks for reading!

Have a great Christmas eve and stay well during the holiday hustle and bustle!