Today was Ellis’ therapy session again and we reviewed the progressive muscle relaxation technique (which is the process of relaxing your body from the top of your head to the bottom of your feet) to a new technique of talking back to the anxiety and fears.
From what I understood, talking back is when you talk back to your fear and you challenge it. For example, Ellis has a 4-H event this Saturday where she will present to the evaluator how she made the brownies and have it sampled. We’ve been working tirelessly on getting the brownie texture and taste just right, and it took us 6 iterations. At one point, I felt like giving up because every batch turned out to be a disappointment, but what kind of teaching moment would that be?
I digress! So the therapist asked Ellis what would happen if she got a low score. Ellis said “nothing” but that she would be “sad.” How long would she be sad, maybe 3 days or 2 weeks? Ellis said that it would be less than 2 weeks and that she’d get over it eventually. What would happen if she felt sad? The therapist reassured her that she would do just fine but that if by any choice she got a low score, it’s okay to feel sad. Sadness is an emotion that we feel to events that don’t go our way and that we need to feel those emotions too. This would be a resilience muscle building process. Presenting her brownies this Saturday will a new experience and that it doesn’t have to be perfect but her best effort. (It went something like that…although I can’t recall it perfectly)
The therapist also agreed with our approach to have Ellis advocate for herself. I usually do this for her, but this time Ellis decided to do it herself. Before the evaluation begins, Ellis will tell the evaluator that she has vocal paralysis so that is why her voice is not loud and that she will try her best to speak as loud as she can. People often comment about her voice and ask her to speak louder, but she can only project her voice so much with that vocal issue. Overall, this Saturday will be a new experience for Ellis and I pray that she will do well, so that she can have a successful experience to build upon for next time.
8 responses to “Therapy about anxiety & “talking back””
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Oh, bless! You’re doing every mortal thing you can to help her and she’s a brave little girl. If they’re not the best brownies in the world… well, she’d get a laugh at mine! Good luck!
You’ve done everything you can to be a good mama! Hopefully Ellis is well-equipped to face her 4-H presentation no matter what happens.
Ellis will be fine – with her therapy and “coaching” and you there, it will go well both speaking and presenting.
I am so impressed you both are doing this!
Thank you! It was at the insistence of the hospital to get help for medical coping. Getting an appointment took months but now that we’re established with a therapist, the process is much smoother.
We’ll be praying for the 4-H brownie presentation! Good luck 🍀! You’ve got this Ellis! You can do it!
Thank you!! We read your comment in the car and I didn’t get a chance to reply then. Ellis was encouraged when she read it and she game a big smile. Thanks friend. 😊